Cheesy Jokes and Serious Thoughts About Thanksgiving

The above joke is probably my favorite cheesy joke of all time.
Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey on Thanksgiving? The couldn't fit the moose in the oven.
  If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims.
  What's the best way to stuff a turkey? Take him out for pizza and ice cream.
  What did the turkey say to the hunter? Quack! Quack! Quack!
Teacher: Where did the Pilgrims come from? Student: Their parents, of course.

Time for a little serious talk about the Pilgrims. Let's delineate: they were not the Puritans. It was the Puritans and Henry VIII-inspired later purges that began the 'off with their head' programs that sent the Pilgrims, and groups like them, to the Netherlands, and later, to Virginia (woops, Plymouth Rock.) The Pilgrims were in search of religious freedom, and not only accepted help from the Wampanoag tribe--local Native Americans--but intermarried with them over the next few generations because so many of the Pilgrim group died the first year after they arrived in 1620. Many members of the Pilgrims left Massuchusetts during the Puritan's religious purges, like the Salem Witch Trials, and went to Rhode Island. The English have a dynamic history of religious freedom, for example, William Tyndale who translated the Bible into the English language and was martyred as a rebel. We have religious freedom now due to this legacy. Thousands of Americans have genetic ties to the Pilgrims (DNA evidence now shows) and that information is something to treasure. Now we live the liberty for ourselves and offer it to others.

What kind of music did the Pilgrims play?
Plymouth Rock and Roll.

Q: Why did they let the turkey join the band?
A: Because he had the drumsticks.

What do you call the dirt on a Pilgrim's hands?
Pilgrime.


 What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a spooky spirit?
A poultrygeist.


What's brown and white and flies all over?
A turkey when you carve it with a chainsaw.


How many cooks does it take to stuff a turkey?
One, but you really have to squeeze him in.

Q: What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner?
A: Your nose.

Why did the glutton get a traffic ticket on Thanksgiving?
He was exceeding the feed limit.

 Grandma: What would you like for dessert, Joey?
Joey: Pumpkin pie!
 Grandma: Pumpkin pie, what, dear? Say the magic word. 
Joey: I'm sorry, Grandma. Pumpkin pie, abracadabra!

 What is Math teachers favorite part of Thanksgiving dinner?
Pumpkin Pi.






Knock, knock, who's there?
Arthur.
Arthur who?
Arthur any leftovers?

What would you get if you crossed Easter and Thanksgiving?
Feaster Sunday.

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving?
A tur-key, of course.

This is my second favorite cheesy joke of all time.

Cheesy Jokes and Serious Thoughts for Halloween

 

Pumpkin carving as fine art: The Headless Horseman

This holiday is very controversial; not only does it offend many family's religious convictions (they may believe it is glorifying the 'dark side') but the images and stories are really scarey and icky, even for adults.  

You don't have to believe in the supernatural to be offended or freaked out by Halloween. The concentration on aberrant behavior is enough to be unsettling. What might we do to take the edge off of the disturbing aspects of Halloween?

All children go through various developmental levels (Piaget's theory of cognitive development http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piaget%27s_theory_of_cognitive_development) and it is possible to create an experience appropriate for the child's development. It is not easy, particularly if you live in the modern world, but with effort, a classroom and a family experience can be healthy for a child. For example, even though I enjoy the television show, 'Grimm," it is really not for young children. The episode, La Llorona, will freak out millions of folks, Hispanic or not. Another urban legend I have learned to never mention in class is Bloody Mary; the kids are truly scared. And what's the point of that? ELA classes can study folklore and Edgar Alan Poe without being traumatized.

How about the Simpson's version? I think Edgar would have enjoyed it.

The Raven by Edgar Allan Poe http://www.schooltube.com/video/e850bdb733e729c582a9/The-Raven-by-Edgar-Allan-Poe

Bart always cracks me up as the raven.

Many families, school, and community groups concentrate on Harvest Festivals. That is a fine contrast to the ghastly. But even if you choose a study of nature, for example, spiders are freaky. Most are just helpful little garden buddies, but there are some dangerous ones. Kids need to know. Same with bats, and various birds. Around here we have huge ravens; I see them with their beady eyes focused on my chihuahua.

So we temper the fun, the imaginative, the quaint qualities of this season with supervision and wisdom. If you feel your child's school is offending your family's sensibilities--tell the principal. Tell the superintendent. You and your child have rights, especially when it comes to the quality of the school community activities. Offer an alternative. Autumn and harvest time (in the northern hemisphere) offers very lovely opportunities for art and activities. You could skip the dark side and go straight to Thanksgiving. 

And don't forget, 'It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!' http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_the_Great_Pumpkin,_Charlie_Brown 

Here's a download: http://www.fanpop.com/spots/halloween/videos/67218/title/peanuts-cartoon-great-pumpkin-charlie-brown

So, where are the jokes? These are just riddle-diculous.

You can actually buy this in NYC.

Did you hear about the new ice cream for monsters? 

Its called cookies and scream.

This is a pic of an actual CookiesNScream Sundae.

Knock, knock, who's there?

Ivan.

Ivan who?

Ivan to bite your neck.

Where did Mzteachuh take the ghost for lunch?

Pizza Haunt.

Why isn't he purple?

Where do werewolves stay on vacation?

The Howliday Inn.

Where does the Wolfman live?

In a werehouse.

Also, my classes used to play 'Name that Tune' with 'Elvira Presents Haunted Hits' just to be very silly. Once we won a decorating contest with our classroom door covered with original panels and comic style story of the Purple People Eater. (Was the People Eater Purple, or did he eat purple people? Inquiring minds want to know.) 

And Drac finally got with it.

bobby 'boris' pickett & the cryptkickers - monster mash 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0thH3qnHTbI 

The mashed potatoes was really a dance?

How do zombies celebrate Halloween?

They paint the town dead.

What oinks and drinks blood?

A hampire.

Sheb Wooley - Purple People Eater (1958) 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9H_cI_WCnE 

 

 Dad: Your older brother sure looks weird and scarey tonight. 

Younger brother: Yeah, just wait til he puts on his mask.

 What did the poultergeist serve at his Halloween party?

Halloweiners.

Routine frequently seen at Middle School dances.

 We can't forget Michael Jackson's 'Thriller." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sOnqjkJTMaA

 What do birds say on Halloween?

Trick or Tweet.

What do fishermen say on Halloween?

Trick or Trout.

THE ADDAMS FAMILY - THEME SONG http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Rn1bzECgHY&feature=relate

What did the little ghost have in his lunch box?

A boo-loney sandwich.

What did he have to drink?

A little box of Ghoul-Aid.

What do you call the eyeglasses for a ghost?

Spooktackles.

Scaredryer.

How did the bootician dry the Wolfman's hair?

With a scaredryer.

Is it good to drink the three weird sister's brew from the Scottish Play?

Yes, its very newt-tricious.

What do baby ghosts like to play?

Shriek-a-boo.

What happened when the phantom disappeared into the fog?

He was mist.

Don't get me started on comic books!Sabrina the Teenage Witch

Did you hear about the hippie werewolf?

He was fur-out, man.

What does an Aussie witch ride on?

A broomerang.

(Well, I'm not.)

And the greatest favorite of all--I even created a tee shirt for myself at Zazzle that read on the back:

I Ain't Afraid of No Ghosts! 

Who ya gonna call?

 Ghostbuster theme song 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytAYsn__ZZI&feature=related 

Halloween Art: Pumpkins and Misunderstood Critters

 

TOP 10 EASY HALLOWEEN BAT CRAFTS FOR KIDS

https://artsycraftsymom.com/top-10-easy-halloween-bat-crafts-for-kids/

Bat Facts for Kids | Classroom Edition Animal Learning Video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVirIPOqC1A

PAPER BAG PUMPKINS

HTTPS://CRAFTPROJECTIDEAS.COM/PAPER-BAG-PUMPKIN-FAVOR/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ez1fYMjOpP4

Black Cat Paper Strips - Halloween craft ideas for kids

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ez1fYMjOpP4

Are Black Cats Unlucky? - Simon's Cat | LOGIC #13

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVOVKHQ0N4I

DIY: Spooky Pine Cone Spiders!

https://www.bargainmoose.ca/guides/diy-spooky-pine-cone-spiders-234411

Spiders for Kids | Educational Science Videos

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRZcbeCSoYQ

HANDPRINT RAVEN CRAFT

https://iheartcraftythings.com/handprint-raven-craft.html

Ravens and crows - the most intelligent birds in the world (animal documentary in HD)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Td-S0fTIGY

Fall Leaf Craft Owl

https://jdaniel4smom.com/2013/10/fall-leaf-craft-owl.html

Owl Facts for Kids

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbvzxiV1zcY

This looks so cute.

What About AI in Education? Pros and Cons

How to help your students use AI without losing the learning

https://www.apa.org/ed/precollege/psychology-teacher-network/introductory-psychology/learning-artificial-intelligence

How AI Can Foster Creative Thinking in the Classroom and Beyond

https://www.edsurge.com/news/2024-09-18-how-ai-can-foster-creative-thinking-in-the-classroom-and-beyond

Using AI to Encourage Productive Struggle in Math

https://www.edutopia.org/article/using-ai-encourage-productive-struggle-math-chatgpt-wolfram-alpha/

What AI is doing to young brains

https://www.apa.org/monitor/2026/09/ai-brain-development-youth

5 Engaging AI Classroom Activities to Try With Your Students

https://www.edutopia.org/article/5-engaging-ai-classroom-activities-try-your-students/

Teachers save time with AI. Their students  may pay the price

https://hechingerreport.org/proof-points-ai-in-teaching/

AI in K–12 Education: The Good, the Bad, and the Guardrails to Consider

https://ies.ed.gov/learn/blog/ai-k-12-education-good-bad-and-guardrails-consider

What Worries Me About Teachers’ Use of AI

https://www.edutopia.org/article/teachers-use-ai-3-troubling-patterns/

New Interesting Education Articles Around the Web

 

At Long Last, Reading Scores for Younger Students May Be Rising

https://www.edweek.org/leadership/at-long-last-reading-scores-for-younger-students-may-be-rising/2026/09

New law could make more substitutes available for California classrooms

https://edsource.org/updates/new-law-could-make-more-substitutes-available-for-california-classrooms

How Forward-Thinking Schools Are Shaping the Future of AI in Education

https://www.edutopia.org/article/how-forward-thinking-schools-are-shaping-the-future-of-ai-in-education

When Words Aren’t Enough, Creative Tools Can Help Grieving Students of All Age

https://www.kqed.org/mindshift/66629/when-words-arent-enough-creative-tools-can-help-grieving-students-of-all-ages?utm_medium=email&utm_source=engagingnetworks&utm_campaign=20260920_News_MindShift_Newsletter&utm_content=20260920_News_MindShift_Newsletter+5643311449

Workplace supports: Trouble with reading and writing

https://www.understood.org/en/articles/reading-writing-workplace-job-supports

Mzteachuh: Creating a Joyful Classroom

 

Emotional Safety: Students require a welcoming environment where the teachers  are happy to see them each day. The procedures and activities are kind, non-threatening and available for acceptance and success. 


Curiosity and Acceptance: Students have the ability to question, imagine, and use flexible thinking. When comfortable to experiment and find answers for themselves, they develop productive struggle in a positive experience.

Play and Creativity:

When you integrate games, role-play, arts and movement the brain triggers a chemical boost that increases motivation, attention, and perseverance.

Social Connection; When students feel secure with social interactions through shared tasks and play with peers, and also confident to interact with adults then there is a positive emotional environment. Students feel confident to enjoy their school day.

Identity and Relevance:

 When classroom activities and lessons connect to students' experiences and real-world experiences, learners feel validated and the group may share  familiarity.

And don't forget...


Humor: Students love to expect a joke on the board and waiting for the punchline, the cheesier the better. Puppets for the younger kids. And don't neglect the 'teachable moment' of something surprising for a laugh, even if it is a little embarrassing for the teacher.

MzTeachuh: Learn About Frequent Disabilities in School Children

 

Developmental Disabilities

https://www.cdc.gov/child-development/about/developmental-disability-basics.html

• Developmental disabilities are a group of conditions due to an impairment in physical, learning, language, or behavior areas.
• These conditions begin during the child's developmental period, may impact day-to-day functioning, and usually last throughout a person's lifetime.
• Most developmental disabilities begin before a baby is born, but some can happen after birth because of injury, infection, or other factors.

What are developmental delays?
https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-you-need-to-know-about-developmental-delayshttps://ncld.org/understand-the-issues/specific-learning-disabilities/

What are Specific Learning Disabilities?

Specific Learning Disabilities (SLDs), commonly referred to as learning disabilities (LD), are brain-based disorders that affect an individual’s capacity to excel in specific academic areas. These disabilities manifest differently but primarily affect reading, writing, and mathematical skills. Here are some of the most common,

https://ncld.org/understand-the-issues/specific-learning-disabilities/

Your chances of knowing someone with learning disabilities are very good. Did you know?

https://ldaamerica.org/support/new-to-ld/

5 Strategies to Help Neurodivergent Students Find Success in Math
https://www.edutopia.org/article/supporting-neurodivergent-students-math

Complete Guide to Dyslexia

https://childmind.org/guide/parents-guide-to-dyslexia/